Today, Jesus teaches us the true meaning of marriage. Everyone is interested in this topic because marriage is the foundation of our family. Marriage is a holy and lasting institution God ordained in the Garden of Eden. But divorce is prevalent in our society today. How can we preserve holy marriage relationship? Jesus gives us a clear answer to this question. Marriage comes from God and divorce is a sin against the will of God. Let’s accept Jesus’ view of marriage and establish a happy marriage to practice God’s love in our family life. May God bless us to become truly one in our marriage relationship. I pray that God may bless American families to be united as one in Jesus. 

PART I. DIVORCE IS NOT A MATTER OF LAW BUT A MATTER OF HEART (1-5)

Look at verse 1. “Jesus then left that place and went into the region of Judea and across the Jordan. Again crowds of people came to him, and as was his custom, he taught them.”  Jesus ended his gracious Galilean ministry and headed to Jerusalem where suffering and death were waiting for him. When crowds of people came to him, he taught them the word of God. Though his heart was heavy with the impending death on the cross, Jesus planted the hope of God’s salvation to them through the word of God. The word of Jesus refreshed their weary souls and revived their hearts to have eternal hope in the kingdom of God. 
 Look at verse 2. “Some Pharisees came and tested him by asking, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?’”  Though the Pharisees were the spiritual leaders to take care of God’s flocks, they were busy to trap Jesus in order to find a way to kill Jesus. They tested Jesus with a tricky question, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” Maybe divorce was a hot topic at that time. This question was a trap to Jesus no matter how he answered them. If Jesus said “yes”, then he would approve of divorce and they would accuse him that he had no love towards women. It was against his teaching about love and compassion. He would legalize the divorce. If he said “no”, he would violate Moses’ Law which permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce. He would become a law-breaker. It was a dilemma. Either answer could cause Jesus to be in trouble. Jesus should have taken the fifth and ignored their hidden motive. But Jesus never took the fifth. Jesus did not answer their question directly. Rather, he asked them in verse 3, “What did Moses command you?” He began to have 1:1 Bible study with them. What did Moses teach about divorce? Look at verse 4. “They said, “Moses’ permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away.’”  Was Moses encouraging divorce? No, he was not encouraging divorce. According to Jesus, Moses wanted to deter divorce because at that time so many men abandoned their wives without any particular reason. They did not care about the women’s need and they were not sensitive toward their feelings. Women could not do anything without a certificate of divorce. They would be in limbo as long as they were married to their husbands though divorce was already done. This certificate of divorce opened a way for them to start a new life. The purpose of the law was to deter divorce not to promote it. They misused Moses’ Law to justify their divorce. Moses never commanded to divorce but only permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce. Divorce was permissible but it was not acceptable. What was Jesus’ final word towards the question of divorce? Look at verse 5. “It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law.” Jesus concluded that divorce is a matter of law but a matter of heart. Jesus exposed their hardened heart. Jesus revealed their evil crooked heart. Jesus rebuked their hardened hearts. Malachi 2:16a says, “’I hate divorce,’ says the Lord God of Israel…” God hates divorce. Why? It breaks people’s heart. It hurts people’s heart. It brings endless suffering and hatred. It produces many broken families. One six-year-old boy travels a thousand miles to visit to visit his dad in the West Coast. Today, divorce became a matter of law. Many people settle their marriage problem in the divorce court. The Court TV shows many cases of divorce. Many famous movie stars divorce and then they capture tabloid headlines. They seem to think it is okay because it is legal. The current popular trend is that even older couples in their sixties divorce in their twilight years. But think about the terrible consequences of divorce. So many people suffer due to divorce. Let me quote a story in the Complete Book of Everyday Christianity, “Brenda was a pert twenty-four-year-old who worked behind the counter in a photo finishing store. I often brought my film there for developing. One day I noticed a tiny diamond ring on her engagement finger. She told me that just last night she had become engaged to the man she was living with. I bragged about how I had been well married for over twenty years. Her face whitened. ’ I have never met anyone married that long!’ she said. I asked her if she would remain married throughout her life, and she answered, ‘I don’t think so. I don’t know anyone who has been married for twenty years.’ Both she and I were amazed by the encounter. “ What does this story tell us about divorce in America? Brenda was thinking about a possibility of divorce before her marriage. Divorce is common in our society. It is legal. Divorce reveals our heart problem. Divorce may be legal but it is not right with God. It reflects our depraved, callous heart. It reflects our sinful heart. Our heart ignores sufferings caused by divorce. Let’s examine our heart at this moment. We must repent our hardened heart and hate divorce. How can we restore the sacred marriage again? Let’s turn to Jesus and listen to what he teaches about marriage.    

PART II. THE TRUE MEANING OF MARRIAGE (6-9)

In this part Jesus taught the crowds of people around him the true meaning of marriage. The crowds of people gathered there to hear a message like the Sermon on the Mount.  But Jesus was suddenly talking about the true meaning of happy marriage. Still, they were very happy to hear what he said. Jesus taught them the true meaning of happy marriage from Genesis. Whenever we see a new sheep, we start with Genesis. Jesus was the same. He also taught the people from Genesis. There is a joke that a pastor visiting a fourth-grade Sunday-school class asked the class, “What does God say about marriage?” Immediately one boy replied, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do!” Many marrying couples do not know what they are doing. Then what does God say about marriage?  Look at verses 6-7. “But at the beginning of creation God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife....’” This is a quotation of Genesis 2:24 which is God’s first wedding Sermon. Jesus saw marriage in view of God’s creation. When God made the world, he also made the first man Adam. Adam was the first steward of God’s world. He worked hard. But he was lonely because there was no suitable helper for him. He did not talk because animals did not understand him. He did not smile even once though he worked in the paradise. God saw that it was not good for him to be alone. So God made him fall into a deep sleep and took one of his ribs and made a woman and gave her to him (Gen. 2:20-24).  From that time on, Adam began to talk and smile and even sing like Isaac team members. He was so happy like M. Abraham Cho who married Andrea recently. After the wedding in paradise, Adam found happiness in God and the meaning of his existence. He loved his wife as his bone of bones. When we study Genesis, we learn that Eve came from one of Adam’s ribs. Therefore, they were in actuality, one.  We can ask the question, “Why didn’t God make a woman separately?” But God did this so that they could be one. Someday they could realize they really are one in God Almighty. Look at verse 8. “‘...and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one.”
Here we learn the true meaning of marriage. In order to marry, a man leaves his father and mother and unites to his wife and the two become one flesh. In other words, two persons get together and become one person in character and in thought world and in faith in God. Mike Mason, author of The Mystery of Marriage, comments that “a marriage is not a joining of two worlds but an abandoning of two worlds in order that one new one might be formed” (p. 91). This was not in Brenda’s mind (nor probably her fiancé’s) as they began to think about marriage. For her the idea of merging two worlds into one is a dusty virtue for antiquated Christians. But the concept of offering up your own life for the blessing of another is both biblical and profoundly spiritual. Marriage is a continual three-stage process that involves leaving old life, being united to his wife and becoming one: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame” (Genesis 2:24-25). Each of these three dimensions is needed for a complete marriage. Unity in marriage is a symbol of strength. 
But in truth, when a man marries a woman they can be two persons forever. Two becoming one seems to be absolutely impossible. It is because each person’s character and nature are different. Some couples are very similar, so they are getting along well. But most couples find they are completely different. Some people quote their irreconcilable difference as their reason of divorce. Because of their difference of opinion or difference in character and difference in sleeping style and difference in eating style, some people divorce. But it is a great sin. God made man and woman and made them one through marriage. Two different individuals become one through marriage. Because husbands and wives are different, they can find a new world, the world of harmony and mystery. They can compliment each other. Of course, they may fight with a trivial matter. They may argue because they are different. But after a fight it is important to pray and forgive each other. Then they can become one again. True happiness in marriage comes when they have harmony and mystery in between them. There is no perfect marriage in this world. There is no perfect marriage partner in this world. We have to make it happen. How? We need the love of God. We have to know how God loved us while we were great sinners. We have to know how Jesus sacrificed his life to love his church. Sacrifice is necessary to maintain marriage life. Selfishness is the cause of many divorces. Husbands must love their wives as their own bodies just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Husbands can express their love through a small but a timely gift. (Eph. 5:25) In turn, wives must respect their husbands and help them to be faithful to God. A wife will respect her husband when he is a good shepherd and Christ-like. Then they can maintain a beautiful marriage life. They can say each other, “If I would go back in time and marry again, I would marry you again.” Then their love grows. Their faith grows in God Almighty. Their hope in the kingdom of God grows in their souls. Their influence flows to their children and many people see God in their happy marriage life. People see God’s love in a beautiful marriage life. S. David Brogi is a faithful man of God and M. Mary is diligent in serving God and family. Both of them are different in character but they love God and each other. S. David thinks that Mary is the most beautiful woman of God and Mary thinks that David is a faithful servant of God. Their five children grow under their care. We have to save marriage in God and value the family as the foundation of our happiness. On Tuesday, America was under attack with deliberate and massive cruelty. We saw the World Trade Center and the Pentagon in flames, the symbols of American freedom and prosperity and security. One man called his wife at home in his last moment of his life from the hijacked airplane to say, “Be brave and I love you. I should have loved you more.” What would you do if you know that you have one minute to live? Probably you will call your spouse if you are a married person. You will call your parents if unmarried. What if you are divorced, you have no one to call. My point is that we have to maintain a family who loves God and loves each other. Many people place a plate in their homes saying, “Sweet home.” Marriage is a beginning point of a sweet home. Today, America confronts many problems inside and outside. It is easy to solve the symptoms of our problems. But the real solution starts from our family. In crisis, people turn to God. In marriage crisis, we also should turn to God and accept God’s sovereignty in our marriage relationship.     
Look at verse 9. “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” This is God’s imperative. Anyone who thinks about divorce is already displeasing God and it is a sin against God.  Therefore, we should not think about divorce, even in our dream. If by some misfortune one has dreamt about divorcing his wife, he must fast several days and repent. It is because a dream always comes from our sub-consciousness. Let’s read verse 9 once more. “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” Marriage is not a human agreement between two individuals. If we think so, it is easy for us to break that agreement anytime. But according to Jesus, God is the master of our marriage. We married before God. Marriage is a life-long commitment. God established our families to serve his mission and live by faith. Therefore, man has no right to separate it because God joined them together. We must honor marriage vows and be faithful to our marriage as God commanded us to do so. Then we can truly please God through our happy marriage.

PART III. THE MOTIVE OF DIVORCE (10-12)

The disciples wanted Jesus to be flexible in divorce. They wanted to divorce if there was a problem in marriage. So they asked Jesus again privately. What did Jesus teach them? Let’s read verses 11-12. “He answered, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.’” Jesus answered clearly about divorce. There was no room to compromise. Jesus plainly told them that divorce is to satisfy the desire to commit adultery.  People explain their cause of divorce in many ways. But at the bottom of their hearts they divorce to commit adultery. Matthew 19:10 says, “The disciples said to him, ‘If this is the situation between a husband and a wife, it is better not to marry.’” They thought that it was better for them to live as a single if they could divorce at all. This is because they did not have faith. How can we be able to marry if we might be stuck with a mean wife and never able to divorce. Then it is better not to marry. But this is because they did not accept that God has established marriage. If God has established, then God can maintain. Many are afraid to marry because so many couples divorce. But when marry before God by faith, then we do not need to fear divorce, but to trust God. If you are a single, it is better for you to marry by faith. In conclusion, I pray that we all may accept Jesus’ view of marriage and establish a happy family life for the glory of God. Let’s maintain the unity of marriage and serve the will of God. Let’s read the key verse 7-8.