You will be a blessing Key Verse: Genesis 12:1,2 "The LORD had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing." I. There was no meaning or direction in my life. I was born in 1970 as the eldest of one brother and two sisters. My father was the youngest of six siblings. He was a gentle and sweet man. However, he was not trained to be responsible for his life, and this world was too tough for him to manage. Whenever he was drunk, he became a different man. He yelled, sang songs all night, fought with my mother and even beat her. My mother, of course, could neither understand him nor could bear him. She attacked him verbally when he came back to his senses. This imposed more stress on him. I could have few peaceful days in my childhood. My father once tried to be a good father by attempting to stop drinking and by working hard. I was happy. But soon his business partner took all the money and he started to drink again. At last, my parents began to live separately when I was fourteen. I wished that this were not real but it was an unavoidable reality for me. While I was going through this hard time, I could not find any meaning, purpose, or direction in my life. Looking on my parents' lives, I thought that life was ridiculous and it was just nothing to me. Everything seemed to be meaningless. Money, honor, or knowledge didn't seem worthwhile to me. I could not find why I should work hard for my life while I did not know the meaning of it. If I gained money or honor without knowing the meaning of it, what good would it be for me? I did not have a desire to strive for a better life. My life was like a machine, finishing all the duties without any joy. Nonetheless, I studied hard and entered Seoul National University in 1989. Since I still had no meaning or direction for my life, I threw myself to my sinful desires. I indulged in drinking and having fun. I organized a drinking fellowship with some friends and drank a lot. We had many parties. New Student Welcome Party, Old Student Cheer-up Party, Bachelor Students' Party and so on. The strong Korean alcohol Soju tasted sweet to me. Sometime later, one member of the fellowship was hospitalized due to heavy drinking. Instead of preparing for an exam, I went around campus to see the beautiful cherry blossoms and enjoyed swimming. But in spite of all these things, I was sad with no reason when I was alone. My inner self was crying. I was a sinner in God's sight. I was wasting my precious life which God had given me, since I didn't know the meaning and direction for my life. II. I found the meaning and direction for my life. Most Gracious God opened up a way to life for me. My cousin, Missionary Stephen Cho who is now the director of Bolivia UBF, invited me to his UBF Center several days before I started the university life. He bought me a delicious dinner and then suggested me to do 1:1 Bible study. When I said a simple yes, he liked it very much with a big smile. I was introduced to Shepherdess Helen Kim Lee of Kwanak UBF and we began to study Genesis. However, Bible study did not influence my life for one semester. But God continued to knock on the door of my heart. Through the 1989 Summer Bible Conference I could see the living God through many shepherds' life testimonies and messages. God gave me a spiritual desire to meet my God in my life. After the Summer Bible Conference, I began to read the Bible everyday after school. At that time, God's words were sweeter than honey. God led me to find myself through John 4:13,14b "Jesus answered, 'Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst." I was thirsty. I tried to quench my thirst by getting drunk and having fun but I became thirsty again because I didn't know the true meaning and real joy in my life. But Jesus gave me a promise: if I drink the water He gives me, I will not thirst again. When I prayed to God with all my heart, He led me to acknowledge that I am a sinner. I confessed my shameful lust and heartlessness with tears. Most of all, I repented of my ignorance of God. God is the Almighty Creator and He gave me a precious life. But I wasted it for my sinful nature without knowing Him, His absolute meaning and purpose for my life. Isaiah 53:5,6 "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed." I realized that Jesus was pierced and crushed for my sins. I repented of my sins. When I repented of my sins, Jesus' grace of forgiveness flooded in my heart and everything in the world looked beautiful. I sang hymns even while I was sleeping. Praise God who saved me and gave me real joy. God led me to see my life from his perspective. God gave me Genesis 50:19,20: "But Joseph said to them, 'Don't be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.'" I realized that God is the Sovereign Lord of my life, and He works for the good of me, even bringing pain and sorrow in my life. With God I knew my life did not happen accidentally. God has purpose for my life. He wants to save many lives. At last, I found meaning and purpose for my life. I decided to live as a campus shepherd and as a missionary in God's time. I was not good at shepherding but God has used me in advancing the gospel to the Seoul National University students. God also helped me to participate in pioneering of Kwanak 2 chapter. God used me as an ancestor of faith in Kwanak for over ten years. Praise God who works in my life for his good purpose. God also helped me to study hard for the glory of God. I prayed to be able to love God with my heart and strength, and I studied hard with the wisdom and strength from God. I didn't have enough time for my studies. But when I prayed, God granted me a good MA thesis and let me get respect from my advisor and colleagues. I also could make a way to America with it. The UMCP will support me during my doctoral study in the Linguistics Department. Praise God who helped me to work hard for the glory of God. God also used me as a blessing for my family. In the past, I could do nothing for my family but feel sorry for them and cry for them. But when I met God in my life, I could believe in God and pray to Him for my family. I invited my sisters to UBF and one of them studied the Bible and attended Sunday Worship Service for a long time. These days my father and mother often see each other and eat together. They promised to go to church from now on. I realize that God wants to bless my family through me. When I look back on my past years I realize that God made me a blessing according to Genesis 12:1,2: "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing." Eleven years ago, God called me out from the meaningless life to a meaningful and blessed life. He used me as a blessing among the people around me. Then God told me to leave my country and my people. He promised to use me as a blessing and make me into a great nation in America. This is a clear direction for my life. I pray that God may use me as a blessing in America. One Word: You will be a blessing.